Archive for September, 2009

Another Reason Why Drivers Hate Bikes

Wednesday, September 30th, 2009

They have one of the freeways around downtown Tulsa closed for reconstruction.  Part of that reconstruction involves the removal and complete replacement of numerous bridge decks.  When the contractor removes a bridge deck, they close the street below that deck so that debris and chunks of concrete do not fall on vehicles and people.  Yes, it is inconvenient to have to detour several blocks, but my life is worth it.  The roof of a car is no match for a falling chunk of concrete.

Imagine my surprise, then, to see a group of bicyclists riding through one of these closed down underpasses!  Yes, they were wearing helmets, but if the roof of a car can’t stop falling debris, a bicycle helmet sure as hell won’t!  Bicyclists constantly bitch and complain that motorists do not respect them, that bicycles are vehicles with just as much rights to the road as cars, and they should be given the same respect and courtesy.  True enough; according to the motor vehicle laws, human-powered vehicles have the same rights and privileges as gasoline or diesel or electric powered ones.  That is why it hacks me off so bad that bicyclists are so arrogant as to ride wherever they want, whenever they want, however they want.  I can’t tell you how many bikes I’ve seen blow stop signs.  And now to see a group of so-called “professional” bicyclists knowingly ride down a street that has been closed.

If you want to be treated like a car, then you must act like one, and follow the same rules and laws that cars must follow.  If you are going to ignore motor vehicle laws, then motor vehicles will ignore you.  It’s as simple as that!

What’s Worse Than Beating Someone To Death?

Wednesday, September 30th, 2009

Why, filming someone beating someone to death! The film of the thugs beating the Chicago teen to death is horrific to watch.  What’s more horrific, though, is that someone stood around and filmed it! 

In the last episode of Seinfeld, Jerry & Co. were arrested after they watched a mugging, having violated a “Good Samaritan” law requiring rendering assistance when needed.  Yes, I know, it was fiction.  Yes, I know, it was comical.  But, that was television, and this is reality.  How in the hell could a person watch another person be murdered and not try to stop it?  It was surreal!  They should arrest whoever filmed it, and charge them with murder as well.  After all, if that person had put down the damned camera and tried to help, perhaps that 16 year-old honor student would still be alive!

Education Kills!

Wednesday, September 30th, 2009

Truth is stranger than fiction!  An Oklahoma AP story from the Sept. 29, 2009, Bartlesville Examiner-Enterprise.

Backpack may be related to girl’s fatal fall

SHAWNEE, OK (AP)  – Police in Shawnee say the death of a 6-year-old girl after she apparently fell from a bunk bed may be related to a heavy backpack she was carrying.

Lt. Roy Gribble says the girl died Friday.  He said her name is not being released pending completion of an investigation.

Gribble says the girl was apparently climbing the ladder of the bunk bed with an 18-pound backpack when she fell.  He says the backpack was full of coloring books and art supplies.

Gribble says no one saw the girl fall.

Take My Substitute, Please!

Tuesday, September 29th, 2009

A very special “The Fine Print” from 24 March 1999.  Why was it special?  It is the only “The Fine Print” not written by me.  It was written by a senior at Little Rock Central High School by the name of Samuel Fuller that I met when I was a substitute teacher for Little Rock Public Schools.  I had read some of his writing, and was so impressed that I asked him to fill in for me for a week.  A decade later, this is still one of my favorite columns, as I thought it was humorously insightful – after all, it was a rare glimpse into the mind of a teenager, a glimpse I wouldn’t see again until I had my own teenagers and began to share their insights on this blog.

http://thefineprint.t2s2.org/Arkansas/tfp032499.html

World War 3

Tuesday, September 29th, 2009

This one is from my Muslim friend, The Persian.  Also a bit dated, but still worth a chuckle.

George W. Bush and Tony Blair are at a White House dinner.
One of the guests walks over to them and asks what they’re
discussing.

“We are making up the plans for World War III“, says Bush.

“Wow”, says the guest. “And what are the plans?”

“We’re gonna kill 4 billion Muslims and one dentist”, answers Bush.

The guest looks to be a bit confused.
“One…dentist?” He says. “Why will you kill one dentist?”

Blair pats Bush on the shoulder and says, “What did I tell you?
Nobody is gonna ask about the Muslims.”

Note To Dubya

Tuesday, September 29th, 2009

Another from OKC Lawyer. This is a bit dated, but still may give a chuckle…

After numerous rounds of “We don’t know if Osama is still alive”,  Osama himself decided to send George Bush a letter in his own handwriting to let him know he was still in the game.

 Bush opened the letter and it appeared to contain a single line of  coded message:

 370HSSV-0773H

 Bush was baffled, so he e-mailed it to Condi Rice. Condi and her aides had no clue either, so they sent it to the FBI.

 No one could solve it at the FBI so it went to the CIA, then to the NSA.

 With no clue as to its meaning they eventually asked Britain’s MI-6 for help. Within a minute MI-6 cabled the White House with this reply:

 ”Tell the President he’s holding the message upside down.”

Wish

Tuesday, September 29th, 2009

This is one I recieved from my friend, OKC Lawyer.

A biker was riding along a California beach when suddenly the sky clouded above his head and, in a booming voice, the Lord said, “Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish.”

The biker pulled over and said, “Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can ride over anytime I want.”


The Lord said, “Your request is materialistic, think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking. The supports required to reach the bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take! It will nearly exhaust several natural resources. I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of something that would honor and glorify me.”



The biker thought about it for a long time. Finally he said, “Lord, I wish that I could understand my wife. I want to know how she feels inside, what she’s thinking when she gives me the silent treatment, why she cries, what she means when she says nothing’s wrong, and how I can make a woman truly happy.”


The Lord replied, “You want two lanes or four on that bridge?”

The Battle Of Big Baby

Monday, September 28th, 2009

The boys and I were having some fun yesterday setting up toys in a mock battle formation so that we could take pictures of it.  The original setup involved the attackers attacking the troops defending the column, aka Demon’s Lookout.  (No, I didn’t make a replica out of mashed potatoes….)  We forgot about monsters…..

Look out, troops!  It's a huge monster!  He's got Clyde!

Look out, troops! It's a huge monster! He's got Clyde!

Needless to say, Number 7 had great fun walking over to our staged battled and eliminating attackers and defenders alike!  “The Battle of Big Baby” was a disaster for our poor, hapless troops!

The Sunshine Employment Saga Continues….

Sunday, September 27th, 2009

Sunshine was supposed to go back to work yesterday.  However, when she turned in her doctor’s note a few days ago, the schedule did not show when she was supposed to be at work.  So, she decided that she would wait for them to call her asking her why she wasn’t there.  Except the call never came.  Because they had sent her home sick, and she had to go to the doctor, who said she was stressed and needed a couple of days off, they removed her from the schedule.  In essence, she was fired for being sick, and they were the ones who said that she was sick in the first place!

About 3 PM, she finally got a call, even though she works the morning shift.  They were concerned about her, because she was supposed to work yesterday.  If she was supposed to work, why take her off of the schedule?  If they were concerned, why wait until the end of the shift to find out if she is okay?  What a load of baloney sausage!  Because she didn’t know she had to work because she wasn’t on the schedule, and because she didn’t show up for the shift she didn’t know about, she is now a no call-no show and unemployed.  They pulled this same kind of nonsense on Number 1.  I will not ever patronize another Braum’s, and I encourage you to do the same!

R.I.P. Caddy

Sunday, September 27th, 2009

Number 1 was so excited on Friday; she had found a new friend, Caddy….

My new friend

My new friend

He's a huge frickin' caterpillar
He’s a huge frickin’ caterpillar

I was very happy for her as well, as she now had her own Hoppy!

I am very sad to report that Caddy has met an untimely demise.  Yesterday afternoon, Caddy was frolicking in the sun on the front porch, and enjoying the contentment that comes with a beautiful Oklahoma autumn day.  Number 3 walked onto the porch, and inquired as to Caddy’s whereabouts.  Number 6 glumly told her that she had just stepped on him in her quest to find him.  Needless to say, his injuries were fatal.
Ray, Number 4, and Number 5 buried him in a simple ceremony in the side yard.  We will miss you, Caddy!